Lovetobecrushed23's blog

I've been on both sides of this... I've even done it recently yet when someone says it to me I tend to shrug it off, yeah yeah yeah whatever we'll see buddy. There isn't really a guide book on how to know how to appeal to someone. There are certainly the obvious "don't do this" things but trash talk, especially in this community is such a hit and miss thing. I certainly don't have a clear cut answer on how to decipher which is which, while our diversity is what makes this a particularly awesome community it also creates landmines we are all subject to step on. I am really curious to hear more perspectives on it.

I will never excuse harassing someone who doesn't want to be bothered, but if it's two guys talking smack to each other I don't think it's that big of a deal. The examples you list here sounds pretty tame to me. Accountability is notable... if there is actually harm done to someone.

What I personally find more objectionable is a supposed tough guys on a fighting site trying to police language and play the hurt-feelings victim card over minor things like some emotional damaged Karen at a pre-school PTA meeting. If someone is honestly bothered by "I could outlast you" they should probably give up combat sports and take up knitting.

That's pretty mild as far as trash talk goes and no one should have a problem with it.... it's when guys persist that it gets really old really quick.
I get multiple messages a day from guys who are "gonna whip my ass easily" they are alway from 55kg twigs who have been here 9 years and have 1.5 past opponents if any!

I simply point out I've been wrestling decades longer than they have been alive, have 150+past opponents (most for multiple rematches) am twice their size, and as mean as a hornets nest.... Let's get real about who is gonna demolish who.
Yet they come back with more and more ridiculous fantasy of what they are gonna do to me and how. There is no talking sense or reality to them, so I shut it down telling them to save it for a meet, I don't do the keyboard warrior thing....They usually persist but all messages are ignored from that point.

Trash talk is fine if you have the skills, ability and strength to back it up, otherwise its annoying cyber fantasy...The guys who do this are the ones who need to apologise.

If I ever had the chance to wrestle you I know I'd get my ass kicked, but I'd love every minute of it and see just how far on that edge you could willingly take me

You'd enjoy me kicking your ass, you say. Well, of course you would. Everyone does. hehe

Lets not toot your horn too quick haha

55kg twigs who rolled with 1.5 people are no joke. When we're talking 1.5 people are we meaning a guy with extra limbs or head or two different people but one is missing half his body? Joking aside, I get that a lot from newbies who think they can take me when I have a decade of formal training. Ok, scrappydoo we hear you.

I agree mostly with Ruffnhard; the noobies often tend to overplay their trashtalking skills, and more often than not the conversation becomes an overly long SNL skit you wish would end. Although I must admit there was a noobie in the chatroom recently who was very entertaining and the rest of us went with it far longer than usual.

Me? I learned early on that I had terrible trashtalking skills. Besides, I am the Gentleman Heel. A true gentleman relies on his superior breeding and superior education to torment the jobberboys.

Some guys are just WAY TO TOUCHY! This is supposed to be for fun and yea each one of us has our nitch I guess.

I like "trash talk" but after a friendly relationship has already been established, othewise it is off-putting! Deano

This is some intriguing dialogue here. I usually don’t venture too much into “severe” trash talk. Reality is I trained a bit of BJJ but over a decade ago & haven’t stay consistent in finding regular submission match opponents to even have “room” to talk. I go into some matches with a known disadvantage. I may assume the role of jobber & enjoy the pre-match banter of the hypothetical outcome of me besting my opponent, which just makes their heel persona come out more. So “we will see” while knowing the likely result (not doubting self, just being realistic) but definitely making them work for it. All the diverse personalities & backgrounds do make any trash talk or banter not a “one size fits all”.

Take it easy, man. Whether you’re a heel or a jobber, trash talk is part of the game. Being cocky, challenging each other, and pushing buttons can make wrestling more fun. What really matters is the context of the conversation. Over time, it becomes pretty clear whether someone is just engaging in playful trash talk or whether they’re actually trying to intimidate, disrespect, or belittle the other person. There’s a big difference between playing the role and genuinely having a bad attitude. So don’t overthink it. Just be yourself, read the other person, and adjust when you realize something isn’t landing the way you intended.

Good grief, toughen up and tell others to do the same.

I think your “trash talking” is very tame. The other guys’ responses should be,’Prove it.” If they’re going to be scared off by a taunt that is quite tame, they might not be the type of opponent you’re looking for.

There are some heels who love to really dial up the trash talking from the start. I can see that being off putting to a newcomer, depending on the kind of match that is planned. There can be a limit to it.

In noobs’ defence, trying to talk tough to a guy that is bigger and/or more experienced or trained might be something they feel they’re expected to do. A lot of experienced tough guys prefer a feisty opponent that will make them work for it. I take on all sizes,including guys that are much bigger and stronger than me. It’s usually clear who is going to come out on top. My trash talking with them usually stops at, “I’ll give you all I’ve got.”

I continue the trash talk after it's clear my opponent is going to best me with repeated submissions (e.g., Doc Holiday). I just change the trash talk from "fear not this won't hurt too much" to "I surely do hope you appreciate the winning experience you are getting from me today."

Ok I want to point out that I think this post I think got taken out of context. I made this blog to apologize to those I may have offended for an action I didn't realize might have been toxic. However, the blog was also for myself so that, as I continue this journey of self-improvement and growth, I can look back on this blog as a lesson learned.