sweatyfuntaps's blog

We’re all here to find opponents. Some might be more active than others. As much as I’m looking forward to getting right to the physical contact (grappling & anything else that may come after if consented & agreed) I try to be mindful of the host. I am stepping into their space. 

While to me it might be just a place to scrap for an hour, to them it’s their sanctuary. It contains many physical pieces of their life. It’s where they eat & sleep a lot of the time. Some may not have even had their family over in a while, but they’re willing to open the door to someone they just recently met online & invite them in to wrestle.

If we’ve only talked briefly about meeting up for a match itself, no way am I going to insist they let me stay the night. That would be a red flag for me that they may have had alternative motives from the start but withheld them until they were already there, which does add pressure to the person being imposed upon. Totally rude and not okay in my book. Now, if it wasn’t planned, but sparks of chemistry fly then I’m happy to follow where that leads. It is still something that is mutually decided, not forced or coerced by any manipulation.

Sometimes, I’m not even hosting at my home. I myself am a guest at a hotel while traveling for work. I need to ensure the room stays in good shape. I’ve sometimes got jet lag or need to be up early. To ask to use the shower is one thing, but taking an exuberant of time refreshing yourself to the point where I have to finally give you a verbal nudge is teetering on being just plain disrespectful. I have early morning work meetings to attend, not that I owe any justification. We had our “match” and I advised I couldn’t stay up much later.

I’ll be setting more firm boundaries going forward. It’s just a lot to have to include in a profile bio update. I like to keep that a light & fun vibe. Nothing against those who smoke cigs or weed, but I’m allergic to both. It’s best practice to be free of overwhelming smells upon arrival. This is genuinely intended to help others make their meetups & matches go as smooth as possible. Put yourself in the host’s shoes… and maybe singlet for a minute.